So, you met a girl on one of the many dating or matchmaking site and you started e-mailing each other. At what point should you ask for her telephone number? Some sources of online dating advice suggest that you should ask for her number as soon as possible and abandon the writing part as early as possible. This suggestion overlooks one very important difference between men and women when it comes to attraction. When you, the guy, decide to contact a woman – you are already attracted to her (photo), and you want to see her. The woman who gets your e-mail message and check out your profile, will most likely have a neutral opinion of who you are, unless you are strikingly good looking, or strikingly unattractive or coming across as illiterate or boring, in which cases she will have either positive or negative impression of you. In most cases, however, as I pointed out earlier, her impression of you will be neutral, and it will take some time until she becomes intrigued by you and interesting and getting to know.
How does this affect the proper timing of asking a woman for her phone number online?
This means that you should exchange a few e-mais to establish a good, interseting, stimulating interaction and get her more curious about you, get her believe that you are not like most other guys who contact you, and make her excited about getting to know. This can take 4 or 5 or more e-mail exchanges. A woman is unlikely to give a phone number or talk to a guy who she doesn’t have any positive feelings about, but she is very likely to want to speak on the phone and meeting in person with a guy who already proved to be interesting and attractive online.
Asking for the woman’s telephone number later than earlier also reduces the chances of her not giving it out, as many women have this artificial “rule” about not giving out their phone number to every strange guy who e-mails them right off the bat.
Of course, you should make sure that your e-mail communication doesn’t last too long, as it will get you in a friends zone and will turn you into one of her chat buddies – something that you surely want to avoid. Like in any other approach, being prompt – making a move when the time is right (not too early and not too late) is important in meeting women online as well.
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