I believe that every great, effective conversation starter with a girl/woman who you want to meet, talk to and ask for a phone number includes the following three essential elements:
* Your conversation starter with a girl should be relevant to the situation. The more relevant whatever you saying is to the situation, the less of a pick-up line it will sound like and the easier it will be for you to actually say it. It’s not always easy to come up with something relevant to say on the spot, but in most situations, and with a little practice, you will improve your creativity to be able to make observations about your surroundings and start a conversation about something that it would actually make sense talking about.
For example, if you are standing at a bust stop next to an attractive woman you would like to talk to, asking something as simple as for directions or whether a certain bus goes to a particular area is a good way to start a conversation. It might not sweep her off her feet and make her fall in love with you right then and there, but it will be a good ice breaker. It is surely better than telling her that you like her shoes or her purse, as that would sound like an obvious come-on. If you are seeing a woman texting on her phone, using a retractable keyboard, one way to start a conversation is to say something like: “I hope they keep making these phones and don’t force us to use touchscreen if we don’t want to” or something along those lines that is just as relevant to that situation. If you see a girl reading a book at a coffee shopt for a long time without letting anything distract her, the moment she stops reading, say “Wow, you have quite an attention span. I am really jealous. I wish I could read without being distracted for half the time that you have bee reading. What’s the secret?”
* Your conversation starter with a girl should be open-ended and not call for a “yes/no” answer. It is much easier for a woman to “help” you carry on a conversation if you ask a question that encourages her to talk rather than say “yes or no” and then go back to her business. You may think that it’s hard for you to start talking to a woman you might be interested in, but it’s just as hard for the girl you are trying to talk to, to engage in a conversation right away with a guy, who is a total stranger. Allowing her to talk rather than give you a brief answer will help her relax and feel more comfortable around you. Thus, asking for directions is better than asking “Is this bus going to….?” Asking a woman who is reading at a coffee shop what the secret to her very long attention span is better than simply complimenting her and saying that she has a great attention span.
* You should start talking to a woman you are interested in right away. Ideally, you should start talking to a woman you noticed as soon as possible. One of the most common mistakes guys make is standing or sitting down near the girl they want to start talking to and lingering around for many minutes, while staring at her and trying to come up with the guts to talk to her. Every guy who has done that knows that the longer you wait, the more awkward and unnatural it would be for you to start a conversation with the girl. That’s why you should start talking to a woman as soon as you are close enough to her to be able to have a conversation. If you come into the coffee shop and you see a girl sitting down and reading, the right time to start talking to her is right before or about the time you sit down. That’s when she is most likely to notice you and lift her eyes from her reading briefly. This will be a perfect time for you to say “sorry, I didn’t mean to distract you”, for her to say “oh, no, it’s ok” and for you to follow up with “what are you reading?” If instead you sit down and start thinking about how to talk to her, not only it will become harder for you, but the chances of the same girl looking at you again and making it easier for you to start talking to her are far less likely.
Keep the above three simple rules of starting conversations with women in mind, and they will likely serve you well in many different situations.