A reader suggests an interesting and apparently effective way for guys to reduce the chances of women flaking on a date and canceling on a short notice. He suggests trying to have a nice, at least somewhat interesting conversation with a girl on the phone before going out on a date, regardless of whether you initially met in real life or through an online dating site or an app. Then, instead of setting up a date during that first phone conversation, tell her that you will call her back 1-2 days later to set up the time and place to meet, when you figure out your schedule. According to him, it takes women about 24 hours after talking to a guy on the phone to figure out whether they actually want to go out with him. And that later feeling is much more reliable than how she feels right after that first phone conversation.
If you call her back a day or two later and she doesn’t pick up the phone or call you back, then you know that she is not interested, and you can safely move on without trying to set up a date that’s not bound to happen anyway. Guess what – you just saved yourself from making an unnecessary effort to meet with her or being flaked on. On the other hand, if you call her back a day or two later, have another conversation and then set up a date with her, she is much less likely to cancel. After all, it’s clear that she wanted to talk to you again, which means she at least somewhat likes you already and she wants to talk to you again. In other words, one of the most effective ways to dramatically reduce the likelihood of any woman flaking on you is to establish some kind of connection with her before you go out with her, so that she actually looks forward to meeting you, instead of treating it as meeting a stranger, who she has no feeling of any kind toward at the time of meeting.