One of the more common complaints that I hear from women about the guys they meet, is that so many guys are boring or at least come across as boring. This even includes some of the more educated and professional accomplished guys. There are several major reasons as to why so many guys come across as boring and uninteresting women, and there are several ways you can turn this around and be a more interesting guy to the women you meet and go out with.
1. Guys are boring because they “walk on eggshells.”
Having met a few girls who are uptight and hypersensitive, and who can’t take a joke, some guys assume that all the women are like that. This is simply not true. Although I don’t have any statistical data about what the percentage of uptight women is out there, we all know that there are plenty of girls who are witty, funny, sharp, and who like sarcasm as much as anyone else, and who can dish a spicy banter of their own. These kinds of women are turned off by a guy who is so politically correct that he talks to her like he would with a co-worker at some corporate office or at a job interview. These kinds of women go “ewww!” when they notice that the guy they are talking to is choosing every word so carefully, as if he was giving some kind of political speech. Of course only you know what kind of women you prefer, but if you would rather meet easy going women who are not stuck up and who like to laugh at the things around them and at themselves, you should not be overly stiff yourself. A little humor and sarcasm when the time and place are right are a natural part of flirting, and a big part of what we all like to call chemistry.
2. Guys are boring because they want to please at all costs.
This is especially common if you like the girl a lot, and if you think she is really special and you don’t meet girls like her very often. This is when you are really afraid to make the wrong move or say something wrong. In addition to walking on eggshells, as noted above, you would tend to agree with every single thing she says, and give her a lot of compliments. A conversation in which the guy says “exactly” and “I totally agree” to everything a woman says is sure way to bore the girl to death, and an express, one-way ticket to friends zone. It is only natural to disagree with others or to offer an alternative view on something when you talk to a girl, and it should not be a problem, as long as it’s done respectfully, and you don’t get stuck on talking about that issue for too long. There is no need to try to prove that you are right and she is wrong, especially if it’s not something all that important or personal to you. As important as global warming, death penalty, the right to carry weapons, and healthcare reform is, these kinds of topics should not be a reason to argue about on a date.
3. Guys are boring because they have nothing interesting to say.
Some men are truly boring. Their lifestyle brings nothing interesting into their life and it brings nothing exciting to talk about. They have few or no hobbies, they don’t watch movies, read books, or attend any kind of interesting events. These men are not into writing or photography, and don’t really have any other creative hobbies.
If that’s you, you better start doing something about making your life more interesting if you want to turn into a more interesting and attractive guy, and someone who actually has something to share and talk about with the women you meet. There will be no overnight solution to that problem. If you have been playing video games 10 hours a day for the past 3 years, it will take a while to build a more interesting life. But if you commit to making small but real steps toward expanding your social and possibly academic horizons, you and your dating life will certainly benefit from it. The first step can be as easy as taking a class at your local community college that you might enjoy, such as creative writing or ceramics, or studying a foreign language. You may consider taking guitar lessons or join a running/hiking club. This might sound cliche now and you might not feel like doing any of these things, but promise to yourself to at least try any of the above or similar activities at least one time. Then, you can make an informed decision whether this is something that you enjoy and would like to continue doing.
As you get involved in more activities and meet more people, you will have more impressions and things to share with the women you meet, and more interesting ideas about the world around you. Thus, the next time someone asks you what you did last weekend, your answer will be something other than “Not much, how about you?”
Some people completely resign from watching TV and they are proud of the fact that they do not waste time on watching reality TV shows and other junk. However, not watching TV at all or not even having a TV set at home is an extreme step that’s simply not necessary. If you don’t watch any TV, you are missing out on interesting, funny, and educational shows. You will also not get the most basic references that other people make about what they see on TV. I was once on a date with a girl who hasn’t even heard about any of the recent movies that came out and any of the top actors. I couldn’t help but wonder if she lived on a deserted island. The fact that she couldn’t relate to so much of the most basic stuff that was going on on television and in the media didn’t exactly make it easier for me to talk to her and connect with her. Remember – the TV is not the enemy. It’s what you watch and how much time you spend watching that makes a difference.
Sometimes, the reason you are being boring is because you are bored. This usually happens if you go out on a date with a girl and you realize that you are not that interested in her. This takes away any motivation to get to know her or even talk to her at all. If that’s the case, you should gracefully excuse yourself as soon as possible and leave the “scene of the incident”, so that you don’t waste your time or hers. There is no way to completely avoid these kinds of situations, and this is just a natural part of dating that you should accept, along with all the other natural joys and challenges of dating.