PracticalHappiness.com

I am a believer in many of the traditional roles of men and women. As such, I do believe that when it come to initiating a contact and making a move, it’s ultimately a man’s job to be the aggressor and to make that first move. This is one of the qualities that make a guy strong and attractive to a woman who he is approaching – seeing that he is capable of doing it and also realizing that he doesn’t wait for things to happen; he takes his life into his own hands.

However, many women face this situation over and over. There seems to be a guy they come in some kind of contact with throughout their daily life who seem to be interested but who also seems to not make a move for one reason or another. This could be someone as close as your school or other organization who you see and talk with every day, who flirts with you and asks you personal questions but who doesn’t seem to quite have what it takes to ask to see you outside of that framework. Or, it could be someone as distant as an employee of a store you frequent at, who is always extra friendly with you and tries to have a conversation with you when you come in without actually asking you out. Often, it’s a neighbor who clearly stairs at you when he sees you as long as your are in his view but never approaches you to introduce himself and talk to you. All these guys have one thing in common – they don’t make a move because they are either shy, or believe it’s inappropriate are are certain that you are not available.

So, you have a choice: waiting for one of those guys to actually make a move and ask you out or be proactive yourself. I strongly believe that being proactive brings many rewards to any person in any area of life, and these kinds situations are not an exception. If the guy is too shy or uncertain to ask you out, then this is unlikely to change in the future. If you are interested in him, you have to understand that one of you has to make a move. While you cannot make him be more outgoing or confident – at least not at that stage, you have a lot of control over what you do, and thus you should consider making a move yourself.

Many women avoid doing so many things when it comes to dating and relationships because they are concerned about being perceived needy or desperate. Ironically, it seems that not doing the things you want because of that concern is the sign of greatest desperation at all. Abandon that mindset! It hasn’t served you well in the past, and it won’t in the future. Instead, learn how to make a subtle, but clear, classy and witty move to let the guy know that you are a confident woman who has an edge to her. This could be as simple as walking by the guy who seems interested and suggesting to check out a new cafe in your town together. Or, it could be as fun as playfully making a comment: “Hey, just so you know – asking me out doesn’t cost anything, and… probably won’t get you arrested.” But, whatever you do will likely be better than doing nothing. And remember the obvious, by making a move you have absolutely nothing to lose. If nothing else, it will be an interesting experience.

Related posts:

1. How to tell a guy that you are interested without being desperate!
2. How to make her more interested in you.

Tags: meeting shy guys