The truth about women’s first impressions

If you have been exposed to any commercially available dating advice, I am sure that you have heard more than once about the importance of first impressions and about the fact that women make up their mind whether they are attracted to a guy and whether they are sexually interested in him within the first few moments of seeing and meeting him, and that’s why the first impression that a guy makes is so important.

However, there is another and somewhat opposite side to this rule. In many cases, first impressions are not as important. In fact, it often takes time for a woman to develop interest in a guy – a significantly longer time than just that first impression.  When you approach and meet an attractive woman, she will likely be very skeptical about you, because she meets so many guys who she doesn’t like in her daily life. Overcoming her initial skepticism and her personal “guards” will take a few minutes, a few hours, or even a few dates. Surely, your looks and your “look” (your eyes, the way you carry yourself, your body language, etc) can give you a certain edge, but ultimately, it’s your communication and your ability to demonstrate your attractive qualities of being interesting, confident and funny with a woman that will usually determine whether she is attracted to you and wants to spend more time with you. And that communication takes time to develop and evolve into something that will make most women attracted to a man.

If I had a penny for every story I heard from a woman who would tell me that she didn’t like the guy in her class or at work at first and she didn’t find him attractive, but with time she developed great interest in him and later, as she got to know him, she became crazy about him, I would be a very rich man today.

Indeed, it’s important to realize that the most common first impression that a single, emotionally available woman gets from most men is a neutral impression or mild interest/curiosity at most. Women rarely become instantly attracted to guys and this usually happens in those rare situations when the guy is unusually physically attractive or when he is some kind of a celebrity that a woman already has great respect and admiration for. Other than that, first impressions have a very limited role in a woman’s romantic interest in a guy and become practically meaningless as soon as a few minutes after the two met and started talking. Thus, in most cases, it’s the guy’s job to create attraction through his communication skills and other qualities of his personality.

So, don’t trust the unfounded rumors about women’s first impressions. Surely, you don’t want to make a horrible first impression on a woman – a woman doesn’t want to talk to a slob or be with a guy who is rude and obnoxious. However, you should not expect a woman to be obviously attracted to you as soon as she sees you. Remember, women are different from men on the most fundamental biological level, and as such – they operate differently. We, men, know what we want when we see it when it comes to meeting women. Women, on the other hand, know that they want it when they find the guy to be interesting, confident, funny, and otherwise worthy of their respect and admiration. Indeed – as all my audio programs suggest – RESPECT is paramount to a woman’s attraction, and earning respect – earning a woman’s admiration of your lifestyle, your choices in life, your actions and your behavior takes more than first impression. Keep this in mind the next time you are starting a conversation with a woman!

Related posts:

1. Are First Impressions Overrated?