There are two bad dating tips that somehow became universally accepted by both, men and women, over the past twenty years or so. They have a tendency of causing more harm than good to your interaction with someone at an early stage, such as your first date or even beforehand.
1. Being a Challenge
Being a challenge never worked as much as some claimed it did, and it certainly not nearly as effective today as it was before when this concept of playing hard to get was a new thing. Acting needy was a much bigger problem in the past than it is today, and therefore learning how to be a challenge with the opposite sex was so much more important. In today’s world, when so many people go on dozens or even hundreds of coffee dates from dating apps that don’t go anywhere, and where so many people act as if they don’t care, because they really don’t – more and more people yearn for that special connection where they really want someone. Even more importantly – they want to be wanted and they want to feel like they are being wanted. Playing hard to get and making yourself more unavailable then you really are with someone you really like and have a potential for developing a great connection, will likely put you in the “sorta” or “maybe” categories in their eyes, and make them want to continue dating others, which certainly doesn’t increase your chances with that guy or a woman.
Contrary to what some dating advice books suggest, waiting for days to respond to phone calls, text messages and e-mails does not make you more attractive. By now, everyone is very well familiar with these games, especially women. If you are trying to be a challenge today, your behavior is obvious to the opposite sex and forces them to either play similar games with you or simply move on.
2. Being As Positive As Humanly Possible During Your First Interaction or First Date
Having a positive, half-glass-full attitude is a great. However, being overly happy and smiling all the time will make you come across as fake and as someone who hides his true identity. You are not a politician running for an office. You can’t and you are not expected to be full of joy all the time. It’s ok to criticize certain things and express your dissatisfaction here and there with what you don’t like and with what you wish was done differently and better. You don’t need to be positive and bubbly all the time. Quite a few people, especially men, find it annoying and non-genuine. You may be worried about pushing your date away by saying something negative or controversial, but if that’s all it takes to push them away, then maybe your interaction with them isn’t really worth having anyway.