Comments on: When you are a virgin but the girl is not http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/ Revolution in Dating and Relationship Advice Thu, 09 Sep 2010 19:52:25 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: practicalhappiness.com http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-3181 practicalhappiness.com Wed, 25 Aug 2010 17:04:16 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-3181 Hello, Sham. I am not sure why you should feel guilty. I understand that a girl who is a virgin would be very sensitive, but expecting you to be a virgin is not really reasonable or fair. If you have some kind of relationship/s before meeting this girl, why should you feel guilty about it. Hello, Sham. I am not sure why you should feel guilty. I understand that a girl who is a virgin would be very sensitive, but expecting you to be a virgin is not really reasonable or fair. If you have some kind of relationship/s before meeting this girl, why should you feel guilty about it.

]]> By: Sham http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-3168 Sham Wed, 25 Aug 2010 11:19:40 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-3168 I am 25, I do have the same problem but vise versa. In my case, i am not a virgin but she is virgin. As i had a very guilty feeling,i told her that i am not a virgin. She is very angry on me and is there any change that she might take me back ? I am 25, I do have the same problem but vise versa. In my case, i am not a virgin but she is virgin.

As i had a very guilty feeling,i told her that i am not a virgin.

She is very angry on me and is there any change that she might take me back ?

]]> By: The Bear http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-750 The Bear Wed, 16 Jun 2010 12:02:40 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-750 Thank you for letting me share. I know it isn't really on subject the whole time but I wanted to share like you said; that virginity is not something that has to be tossed away. And in my personal opinion, it should be cherished; it is of great value. Resisting social pressure and standing on what you see as right, makes one a stronger person, someone to be admired. Thank you for letting me share. I know it isn’t really on subject the whole time but I wanted to share like you said; that virginity is not something that has to be tossed away.
And in my personal opinion, it should be cherished; it is of great value.
Resisting social pressure and standing on what you see as right, makes one a stronger person, someone to be admired.

]]> By: practicalhappiness.com http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-746 practicalhappiness.com Mon, 14 Jun 2010 17:31:58 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-746 Thanks for sharing your personal experience. Hopefully, this will be helpful to all those guys and women who think that virginity is something they have to get rid of urgently and that it is some kind of blemish in them. The reality is that it is a wonderful thing if perceived the right away and if one knows how to disregard the social pressure. Thanks for sharing your personal experience. Hopefully, this will be helpful to all those guys and women who think that virginity is something they have to get rid of urgently and that it is some kind of blemish in them. The reality is that it is a wonderful thing if perceived the right away and if one knows how to disregard the social pressure.

]]> By: The Bear http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-745 The Bear Mon, 14 Jun 2010 15:31:55 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-745 I have to add that I am currently in a relationship that is so promising that I am thankful the others have failed! She is the most wonderful woman I have ever met. AND, she is everything I was looking for. (be careful that as you age you dont get too picky, and remember what you loved about each girl you were with) I was patient, consistent, knew what I wanted and knew when to draw the line and end it. (and don't be too hurt if you get dumped, its usually a good thing) After six months of being together we've had allot of deep discussions(we started this relationship with the intent of seeing if we were compatible for marriage, because we are both ready for that step in life) and yet never had an all-out fight. Disagreements? yes, naturally. But we have not had a 'fight'. And I don't beat around the bush about stuff. I am very direct and open and honest. As well as very perceptive(some say its annoying but they love how much I care about their issues and problems in life) And some women hate it. But most value it. And she too respects and values me and my commitment to retain my virginity. She has even thanked me for it a few times. I have to add that I am currently in a relationship that is so promising that I am thankful the others have failed! She is the most wonderful woman I have ever met. AND, she is everything I was looking for.
(be careful that as you age you dont get too picky, and remember what you loved about each girl you were with)
I was patient, consistent, knew what I wanted and knew when to draw the line and end it.
(and don’t be too hurt if you get dumped, its usually a good thing)
After six months of being together we’ve had allot of deep discussions(we started this relationship with the intent of seeing if we were compatible for marriage, because we are both ready for that step in life) and yet never had an all-out fight. Disagreements? yes, naturally. But we have not had a ‘fight’. And I don’t beat around the bush about stuff. I am very direct and open and honest. As well as very perceptive(some say its annoying but they love how much I care about their issues and problems in life) And some women hate it. But most value it. And she too respects and values me and my commitment to retain my virginity. She has even thanked me for it a few times.

]]> By: The Bear http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-744 The Bear Mon, 14 Jun 2010 15:11:10 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-744 @Guanetidino: You can actually be proud of your virginity. It is rare for a guy to be able to offer a woman that gift. I am 25 and I have actually turned down sex on many occasions and with several very serious relationships (even while I was engaged) because I wanted to save that gift for my wife. My engagement fell through and I was again single and proudly still had my gift to give to whoever becomes my wife. I believe that it is also the highest respect I can show a woman. That I value her enough to wait until I am married to her to have sex, and if we don't get married that neither she nor I will have to carry those memories. That way we are able to focus on the other very important parts of a relationship. Since my broken engagement I have had a few girlfriends come and go. And I have had some deep relationships with them. I try to avoid becoming physically intimate early in the relationship. And always refuse sex. This way I can show my respect for them, and show my affection for them. My ex-fiancee' said that it meant so much to her that I loved her enough to refuse what I so strongly desired. In my case it showed self control and commitment. And these are greatly important things in life. And as I moved from one relationship to another, each woman was openly appreciative of my commitment and self control. It made them feel safe and gave them security and control. Things that are important for woman. They want to trust you with their lives and yet not be owned by you. The best relationships I've had are the ones where we were truly best friends first and foremost, GF&BF second and lovers lastly. (Most guys, sadly, want it the other way around. And women don't.) I have had a number of relationships and by focusing on friendship and compatibility first, and then being lovers, I was able to find women who not only wanted to be with me, but wanted to be my life partner. But be careful when they move that way too fast, they might be wearing rose-colored glasses and will overlook important things. Thats why I avoid the physical relationship as much as possible, so that I myself can remain objective. Its just my 2-cents but I hope it helps. -The Bear @Guanetidino:

You can actually be proud of your virginity.
It is rare for a guy to be able to offer a woman that gift. I am 25 and I have actually turned down sex on many occasions and with several very serious relationships (even while I was engaged) because I wanted to save that gift for my wife. My engagement fell through and I was again single and proudly still had my gift to give to whoever becomes my wife.
I believe that it is also the highest respect I can show a woman. That I value her enough to wait until I am married to her to have sex, and if we don’t get married that neither she nor I will have to carry those memories. That way we are able to focus on the other very important parts of a relationship. Since my broken engagement I have had a few girlfriends come and go. And I have had some deep relationships with them. I try to avoid becoming physically intimate early in the relationship. And always refuse sex. This way I can show my respect for them, and show my affection for them. My ex-fiancee’ said that it meant so much to her that I loved her enough to refuse what I so strongly desired.
In my case it showed self control and commitment. And these are greatly important things in life. And as I moved from one relationship to another, each woman was openly appreciative of my commitment and self control. It made them feel safe and gave them security and control. Things that are important for woman. They want to trust you with their lives and yet not be owned by you.
The best relationships I’ve had are the ones where we were truly best friends first and foremost, GF&BF second and lovers lastly. (Most guys, sadly, want it the other way around. And women don’t.)
I have had a number of relationships and by focusing on friendship and compatibility first, and then being lovers, I was able to find women who not only wanted to be with me, but wanted to be my life partner. But be careful when they move that way too fast, they might be wearing rose-colored glasses and will overlook important things. Thats why I avoid the physical relationship as much as possible, so that I myself can remain objective.

Its just my 2-cents but I hope it helps.

-The Bear

]]> By: practicalhappiness.com http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-380 practicalhappiness.com Sun, 23 May 2010 01:32:57 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-380 Thanks, that's the mindset I was looking for. I am glad to hear it. Thanks, that’s the mindset I was looking for. I am glad to hear it.

]]> By: Guanetidino http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-374 Guanetidino Sat, 22 May 2010 07:49:46 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-374 Arkady, you are right! A lot of statistics don't reflect my own reality. Your words really make me happy, believe me. Now I feel like a normal man with just a passing state to live. My last question is this: would you tell a girl that you are virgin even in case of a one night stand? I have understood a lot of things from your posts, really important things: 1) Nothing wrong with being virgin; 2) For a lot of girls don't matter if a guy is virgin. However, I haven't really understood why telling I am virgin is so necessary. I mean: I could hide the truth not because i think being virgin is wrong, but for a question of privacy. What do you think. P.S.: I would like you to know that your previous posts really help me feel better! Thanks very much! Arkady, you are right!
A lot of statistics don’t reflect my own reality.
Your words really make me happy, believe me. Now I feel like a normal man with just a passing state to live.
My last question is this: would you tell a girl that you are virgin even in case of a one night stand?
I have understood a lot of things from your posts, really important things:
1) Nothing wrong with being virgin;
2) For a lot of girls don’t matter if a guy is virgin.
However, I haven’t really understood why telling I am virgin is so necessary.
I mean: I could hide the truth not because i think being virgin is wrong, but for a question of privacy. What do you think.
P.S.: I would like you to know that your previous posts really help me feel better! Thanks very much!

]]> By: admin http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-373 admin Sat, 22 May 2010 06:47:57 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-373 My pleasure. Again, you should stop worrying about statistics and about other guys. We all have a different path and move at our own pace. Some people lose virginity at 12 and others lose at 30 or later. Who knows what's better or if there is any such thing as "better." And about statistics - do I really need to bring you examples of how meaningless statistics can be? Just read some of them on just about any issue and see for yourself if they reflect your own reality. My pleasure. Again, you should stop worrying about statistics and about other guys. We all have a different path and move at our own pace. Some people lose virginity at 12 and others lose at 30 or later. Who knows what’s better or if there is any such thing as “better.”

And about statistics – do I really need to bring you examples of how meaningless statistics can be? Just read some of them on just about any issue and see for yourself if they reflect your own reality.

]]> By: Guanetidino http://www.practicalhappiness.com/when-you-are-virgin/comment-page-1/#comment-354 Guanetidino Fri, 21 May 2010 08:42:24 +0000 http://www.practicalhappiness.com/?p=53#comment-354 Arkady, really really really thank you for your words. The way you reply is really satisfying for the reader. You are right: comparisons are sterile. I am just a bit discouraged from statistics: very few people have lost their virginity at the age of 26. Incredible. Do you think I should tell the truth even if it will be just a two days adventure? Thank you again! Arkady, really really really thank you for your words.

The way you reply is really satisfying for the reader.

You are right: comparisons are sterile.
I am just a bit discouraged from statistics: very few people have lost their virginity at the age of 26. Incredible.

Do you think I should tell the truth even if it will be just a two days adventure?

Thank you again!

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