One of the most bitter complaints that women have about men is that guys often don’t call or completely disappearing after they have sex once or twice, and they just move on to another girl. However, the fact that women do the same thing is rarely mentioned. This kind of behavior is just as disappointing to men, especially in situations where the guy really liked the girl, was really attracted to her and on more than one level, and was hoping that he will develop something more meaningful with the girl. No single man or a woman is insured against that kind of disappointment. However, it’s important to understand and be aware of the three main reasons as to why women disappear after sleeping with a guy, besides the obvious one, where that woman was disaappointed in the guy sexually and is not interested in giving it another shot:
1. She feels guilty and embarrassed about sleeping with the guy too soon. Despite the strong women’s liberation movement in many parts of the world, many, if not most, women still follow certain rules and they have an idea of what should happen between them and the men they meet and when. A woman who sleeps with the guy too soon might feel that she was too easy, acted like a slut and that the guy might also lose respect for her as a result, and they will have no future. Even though this is certainly not always the case, the fact that that’s how a woman feels might make her not want to see that guy ever again. The important aspect of men’s psychology and sexuality that many women don’t realize (and I wish they did) is that just because the guys slept with the girl too soon doesn’t mean he lost respect of her or that they have not long term relationship potential. In some cases it’s true and in others it’s not. Many other factors will determine how the guy will feel about that woman in the future, including her personality, how well they get along, and of course where that man is in his life and what he wants from women in general.
Waiting for months to have sex with the guy will surely reflect on his serious intention about the woman he is going out with, but it’s not an insurance policy against him leaving that woman shortly after they have sex, in part or in whole because he might be disappointed in her sexually. This doesn’t even take into account the not unlikely possibility of that guy, who is “waiting” for a woman, to sleep around with other women on a side while he is “waiting.”
2. She didn’t really like the guy and her reasons for sleeping with him have nothing to do with who he is. Just because a woman has slept with the guy doesn’t mean she liked him very much. She might have been on a rebound and she needed some affection and comfort from anyone at that very point. She might not feel very secure in her appearance, and she needed reassurance that she has still “got” it and that she continues to be sexually desirable. Perhaps she never had a one night stand and she is curious about what it feels like. It’s also not impossible that her current partner has cheated on her and she is out for revenge.
3. She is dating several guys and is looking for the “best offer.” It’s possible that the woman you had sex with and hoped to see again is actually looking for a relationship but she is currently seeing several guys and she is trying to figure out who she likes the most. You might just not be that guy.
Regardless of what reason or what combination of reasons made the woman you met and liked disappear, it’s important that you are aware that it may happen to you when you meet someone new, that it happens to other guys, and while you should certainly hope for the best, you should be ready for these kinds of disappointments as well. This is just a natural part of dating.