Men’s tendency to cheat on the women they date and even have strong feelings for is one of the most common and the most painful issues that women have to deal with in their relationships with guys. So many women can recount numerous relationships during which they found out that their guy was not faithful. Sometimes, they guy would be cheating on them with some random girl that he met at work or at a bar, while at other times it would be someone the girl knew fairly well or it was even her friend. Being scarred by prior disappointments in guys who cheated on them, many women are unable to enjoy their present relationship, even when everything seems to be great, because of that constant fear that sooner or later their boyfriend, or a husband will cheat on them, just like the others did in the past.
Even though it is impossible to fully protect and “insure” yourself from being cheated on, I strongly believe that understanding the reasons behind this common sexual behavior of a typical, modern man in a western society is important for one major reason: it will help you, as a woman, handle yourself and the situation much better if your current or future partner does end up having an affair and cheating you, by making it easier for you to decide whether you should give it another chance and forgive the guy who cheated or whether you should break your relationship off and never look back.
Here are the top three common reasons why men cheat:
1. The first most common reason why men cheat has nothing to do with the woman that they are cheating on.
Most men are driven by a powerful natural force to seek novelty and variety when it comes to sexual partners. There is more to that drive than just trying to get laid. The desire to be liked and attract women is one of the most significant ways through which men are able to validate their masculinity and sense of self worth. This has always been, is, and will always be at the core of male nature among humans and many other living beings. For some men this stage of life is short, and by late 20’s or early 30’s they “snap” out of it. Other guys continue to play the field for much longer or even for the rest of their active lives. Playing the field now is of course easier than than ever before with the emergency of overwhelming popularity of online dating, which makes it all the more tempting to date and sleep with tons of people.
Some men “settle down” or marry while they still have this urge to have new and multiple sexual partners and many of them act on it. Thus, no matter how wonderful their girlfriend or wife is going to be, they will not stop pursuing new interactions with women and new sexual experiences. Nothing will replace the excitement of, and the satisfaction from, having new experiences with new female partners, and it would be pointless to try to change such a guy. This desire for novelty and variety of dating and sexual partners is particularly strong among divorced men who come out of a long (unhappy / sexless) marriage. Feeling that they missed out on all the fun of being single and free for their ten, fifteen or twenty years of married life, they are very eager to make up for it by reverting to a 20’s lifestyle of going out to bars and clubs as often as possible, being active on a bunch of different dating sites, and taking other steps to meet and have sex with as many women as possible, including traveling to other countries where sex is more available.
2. The second most common reason men cheat is because many women are simply not good enough in bed to keep their partner sexually excited and satisfied.
They don’t know what they are doing with their bodies, hands and mouth. Few men will stick around and appreciate a woman who is a mediocre sex partner. I have seen many guys dump very beautiful women for that exact reason. Those women’s beauty was “neutralized” by their incompetence or their behavior during intimacy that chilled romance, or by their being boring in bed and not offering a sexual experience that’s “spicy” enough to keep the guy’s interest in the long run. Just like a woman who was bored on a date is not going to return that guy’s call or text, the guy who has been bored with his girlfriend or a wife in bed is going to start looking for an adventure an excitement on a side. This is especially likely to happen if that guy had experienced great and exciting sex in the past with you or with some other woman, and he is looking for an equally good experience today.
3. The third common reason why men cheat is because some women have nothing else to offer but their physical beauty and sex.
It is ironic, but if the guy only gets sexual satisfaction from a woman and he is not stimulated by her in any other way, he is probably going to be seeking an affair as well, because he knows that sexual experience that doesn’t transcend physical connection cannot match physical intimacy that’s couple with great mental connection. A guy will pretend to like the girl just to get in her pants, but if there is nothing else between them besides sexual attraction and they have nothing to talk or laugh about outside of bad, that affair is doomed to be limited to sex and in time till that guy finds a better or at least newer “deal”. It’s a hard question to ask yourself about you and your relationships with men, but if the guys you date keep cheating on you, you have to ask yourself – is it possible that you didn’t really enjoy each other’s company outside of bed, and is there anything you can do to become a more interesting company to the kind of men you like, so that they will appreciate you outside of bed.