“Don’t let them get into your pants easily. Make them work for it, and make them work HARD for it. If he does not want to work for it, let him walk and move onto the next man (men are like buses, in 15 minutes another one will come around)…Who is next? Stay single as long as you can. Do not settle down easily. Date a lot of different men, and date them all at one time. … This works in the real world and it works in the online dating world. When it does, you will be overwhelmed with excitement. Dating will become fun and you will feel so empowered. … When you do, a completely new world awaits you! You will never look at men the same way again.” – this is an excerpt from a chapter about online dating from a popular dating advice book for women “The Power of Pussy”. This might be some the most harmful advice that a single woman can receive for several major reasons. The most important reason is this: when you date too many guys and when you them all at the same time, you become tired and exhausted physically and mentally.
Dating 3 guys or more at the same time or going out on more than 2 first dates a week will necessarily tire your body and mind and will turn dating into another job. As a result, you will lose one element in your own mental state which is critical to making a meaningful, fulfilling and exciting connection with a man – you will lose enthusiasm about meeting guys and the whole dating process.
A woman who dates too many guys at once or who goes out on too many (first) dates is not going to be nearly as enthusiastic about meeting or going out with the next guy. That lack of enthusiasm will make her look unexcited, unattractive or even jaded. If she doesn’t look jaded, she will certainly feel jaded. She will act aloof on dates, and the guys she is going out with will surely notice that. It’s hard to be interested in a woman who is not only not interested in you, but she is kind of indifferent to dating altogether, and the next guy she is going out with is just another “bus” who can’t possibly be special to her, even if he was actually a special person. You may ask a random single guy whether “enthusiasm” is something he is looking for in a woman. He might not immediately realize how important that quality is to him in a woman, but if he were to take a few minutes to think about it, he would necessarily agree that meeting or being out with a woman, who seems to be interested in him and in the idea of romance itself, is a much more fun experience and it makes a woman much more attractive and desirable to him.
The excitement of dating a many guys as possible, that the writer of “The Power of Pussy” talking about, will only last for a few weeks at most in the very beginning of that kind of hyperactive dating, and it will soon be replaced by dating fatigue.
Luckily, that loss of enthusiasm is a curable problem, and it can be fixed relatively easily. If you find that you lost interest in dating and that all men seem to be the same to you after dating 20 or more guys, or after going out on 30 first dates over the past month or two, the best and the most effective solution to this problem is taking a break from dating altogether and committing to it. Set a date and disable all your dating profiles and stop talking to the guys who you are not interested in for at least one month. Then, when the month is over, go back to meeting guys (online or otherwise) and this time, instead of dating as many guys as possible, try to be more selective.
When you start dating again, don’t go out with guys just to go out and have fun (that’s another bad suggestion that “The Power of Pussy” makes). Don’t trade your time for the company that you are probably not going to enjoy. Instead, be more selective and wait till you meet a guy who doesn’t sound “average” to you but who sounds interesting – someone you will actually look forward to meeting.
The above advice, of course, applies to single men who are looking to have a special connection with a woman as well. If you want to fall in love with a great woman, you need to be and come across as excited and enthusiastic when you meet her, as that kind of energy is essential to creating that kind of connection. This doesn’t mean that you have to jump up and down from joy when you meet her. But this means that you should feel like your first date is not a mundane routine, like dinner or meeting at work.