Three Practical Tips For Acing Your Video Call Before Your Date

I have as many complaints about the negative impact of technology on dating and love as anyone else. However, I also say – if you can’t beat it, join it and make the most out of it. Having a video call before meeting in person is one of the best ways to both, screen the people you aren’t going to like and save yourself and them the time and trouble of meeting in person, and also greatly enhancing your future date with those who you are going to like by turning that first date into basically a second date, where both of you will actually be looking forward to meeting each other after enjoying speaking with each other over video. 

Here are three basic rules  for making the most out of your video calls before your date: 

1. Do speak on the phone first before getting on that video call. It’s much easier and less awkward to have a video call with someone whose voice you already heard and who you are intrigued by than having some type of forced conversation via video with someone you haven’t spoken before. Ideally, you want to go from a few text messages to a regular call and if that call goes well, you can have a video chat.   
2. Be in a comfortable place where you don’t have to move around with your phone and where you don’t have background noise. It’s not much to ask that you give the person on the other side of your video chat undivided attention and make that call as easy and as pleasant as possible by not having any distractions on your end and by being heard clearly. You don’t have to be in a professional studio, but being in a quiet room with your phone positioned on a table in a way where the image won’t be shaking will make that all the more conducive to having a good conversation.  You shouldn’t be walking down a busy, loud street during that first video conversation because it will automatically suggest that you just don’t care to put minimal effort into making a decent first impression. And, speaking of first impressions – it goes without saying that you should put yourself together at least somewhat when you get on that video call. This applies to men as much as women. 
3. Feel free to have the most random conversation on that video call to make it more interesting and different. Ask about where the other person is at the moment, what you see in the background in the video, compliment their hair or what they are wearing in a flirty yet non-sexual way, or point out something in your room that’s interesting. Feel free to pick an item in your room that becomes relevant in that conversation to spice things up. Perhaps you bought an interesting book, or a piece of art, or a gadget that you can mention and show off, or a funny gift you received. Don’t be afraid to get away from the typical and cliche topics. This will only make that video call all the more interesting. If you read an interesting article, feel free to quote parts of it if it becomes relevant during your video chat. 

And, if he or she tries to give you a hard time by accusing you of you of “screening” your dates through these video calls, don’t get defensive, but instead, strike back playfully with solid and inevitable truth – “don’t we all screen each other all the time, whether we want or not?” and move on to talk about something else without getting stuck on this issue for more than 5 seconds.