Writing a great, compelling dating profile is just as much about avoiding the common dating profile mistakes that other women make, as it is about including the right content, would would tell the few quality men out there who you are interested in meeting that you are different, you are more interesting and you are worth meeting.
Being a woman, you may think that it really doesn’t matter what you write in your dating profile and all that guys are looking at when they are browsing women’s profiles on the dating sites is their photos. I am sure that it is true with regard to some men, but not all. Many guys do read what you have to say on your profile, especially the men who met their fair share of women who had nothing to them except their looks, and that’s the kind of woman they are looking to avoid.
If you are interested in meeting a guy who is special, who is better, smarter, more interesting and otherwise more desirable than an average Joe, you should realize that it takes a better profile to make it happen. Your writing has to stand out to attract the kind of a guy that also stands out from the rest. Your profile should also be free of those common mistakes that make so many other dating profiles look boring and cliche. The following are six such typical mistakes that you should avoid making when writing your own online dating profile:
1. Make sure your online dating profile is not boring / full of cliches.
Whatever you write in your dating profile, make sure it’s not just another typical, cliche list of self-serving adjectives of how educated, intelligent, honest, adventurous, and compassionate you are. You simply cannot expect to get the attention of an exceptional guy, if your dating profile is just as generic as that of every other girl. Be bold! Share a few of your thoughts and opinions on random things that you think and care about without holding back too much, and that will necessarily attract the guy who is right for you. Check out this article for great tips on writing an effective, interesting dating profile. It was written mostly for men but the same principles apply to women’s profiles.
2. Don’t unnecessarily restrict the type of a guy you are willing to meet.
It always makes me laugh when a 35 year-old woman writes in her profile that she is only willing to meet guys who are at least 6 feet tall and who are between 32 and 38 years old. This is ridiculous to me mainly because I know that what that woman says is simply not true. She would be thrilled to meet a guy who is outside of that age bracket and who is not quite as tall, if he possesses other qualities that make him attractive to her. It’s also sad how many guys actually take this kind of strict approach on the women’s part literally and don’t even bother to contact that kind of woman just because they are a few years older or younger than what a woman mentions in her profile or they are an inch shorter than her stated height requirements.
Consider not narrowing down the age of the men you are willing to meet too much, so that you don’t leave out potential matches just because they are just slightly older than your “ideal match.” Narrowing down the age of men too much will make your search for that special guy much harder. It will also likely make you miss out on meeting some great guys who were discouraged from contacting you because of your strict age requirements, even if otherwise you could have potentially have great chemistry. Many women do not want to date older guys because they met one or two older men before who turned out to be out of shape and old not just in age but also in spirit. But this doesn’t mean that every older guys is like that, and you should not be dismissing older men just because of one or two bad experiences in the past. Some guys in their 40’s and 50’s are much stronger and more active than the ones in the 30’s.
3. Don’t focus your dating profile around your children.
It’s great if you have children who you are proud of, and raising them should be one of your main priorities that also makes you happy. However, there is no reason to include five photos of you with your kid in your profile and beginning your profile with “My child is the most important thing in my life and if you are not ok with that, move on now…” This does not do anything good for you as far as meeting men on the internet dating sites goes. It creates an impression in a male reader that you will hardly be available to go out and that you will never be able to develop any meaningful connection with the guy. Remember, dating sites are not designed to display your familial situation. They are meant to help people meet each other and create romantic connections. Surely you should be honest about the fact that you have children, but it’s not a good idea to let the whole male world know in advance that they will always be in second place in your book – far behind your child. You are not on that site to find a babysitter or even a roommate. You are there to meet a guy who you could go out with, learn about each other and find out if you are interested in each other romantically. Keep that in mind when you write your profile and post your photos.
4. Avoid posting photos that may cast a negative light on your personality.
If all your photos have you and five other girls being drunk at a bar making faces at each other, you better consider posting some new photos that put some more serious light on who you are and how you live your life. Certainly it’s good to show that you like to have fun, but … it’s equally or even more important to show that you have a serious side as well. Ideally, you should have a close-up photo of your face and a full body image which shows, without being overly revealing, the shape of your body. You cannot go wrong with having a full-body photo in a business casual attire or even jeans and tank top if it flatters your body.
5. Don’t Post Misleading Photos.
If you are overweight, don’t try to hide it in the photos by only posting the photos of your face. Sooner or later, you will have to show the rest of your body to the guy, so why waste your time or his? It’s much more painful to see a disappointment on a guy’s face when he meets you for the first time, realizing that you look very different from what you represented in your photos, than simply not being contacted online because you are not the guy’s type physically.
6. Don’t waste any space on your page on telling the world what kind of guys you don’t want to meet.
For some reason, quite a few women out there think that telling the world about how much they dislike men who are unemployed, thugs, liars, cheaters is going to make them sound all the more attractive. Many of women’s profiles have way too much of “if you are …. then don’t bother”, or “don’t contact me if…” This is hardly flattering. What it says to the male reader is that the reason you mention all these deal breakers is because you have been there and done that. Therefore, you have had so many bad experiences with guys that you are likely to be extremely jaded and damaged by that, and that’s not a good start.
Avoiding the above typical dating profile mistakes when writing your online dating profile is likely to make your profile far more attractive. If you are just about to create a new dating profile for yourself, keep the above tips in mind. If you already have a profile up, glance over the above points and use it as a simple checklist. Fixing your profile and removing the things that make it unattractive will only take a few minutes, but it is also likely to make your profile far more appealing to the kind of guys that you want to meet.
