One of the most fundamental tips on how to approach and meet women that I have ever heard was from my father over 20 years ago. He told me: “Don’t look for opportunities to meet women, but instead take advantage of the opportunities with women that your life presents to you every day already.”
That advice was as valuable back then as it is today. Going out with the sole purpose of meeting women has way too many drawbacks. You focus too much on meeting women, which makes you come across as “weird” when in public. If you don’t know what I mean, just look at the guys around you when you go out and try to pick out from the crowd those guys who look like they are on the “prowl.” I bet they would look very obvious to you. Do you want to look like them? I assure you that that’s exactly how you look when you stand at a bar with a drink next to your friend and stare at the women who walk by or even worse – who sit by the bar and talk to their friends. More importantly, when you go out to just meet women and do nothing else, if you do not meet any women by the end of that night, it will really take you down and upset you. You will feel like you wasted the whole night and didn’t have fun at all. Therefore, it is very important that whenever you go out, you have other reasons to be out at any specific places besides meeting women.
This means that you shouldn’t be going to a bar/club that you really don’t like just because there are many women in there. Go to a place that you can enjoy spending time in regardless of whether you meet anyone there. Whether it’s the music, the atmosphere or anything else – make sure that the place has another appeal to you, beyond having women. If you go to a coffee shop that you know many women frequent, don’t just go there to hang out and stare at people. Bring a book or your homework, so that you can do something interesting and productive even if there are no girls in there.
When you have that kind of “back up plan” you are never going to be too upset about not meeting anyone on any given night. After all, hopefully you have done something either useful or fun anyway.
