Some of the most “single” women who are literally obsessed with meeting guys that I have known and whose behavior I observed also struck as the most unapproachable and unfriendly looking. In an attempt to avoid at all costs coming across as too eager and too desperate, they go to another extreme and act like they don’t want anyone to talk to them. Angry faces, sunglasses, arrogant walk and body language – these are just some of the things that these women seem to use as some kind of self defense mechanism against being perceived as vulnerable or lonely.
As popular as this kind of “tough” behavior might be, it never benefits those women and it certainly doesn’t make their dating life more interesting. On the contrary – by looking unapproachable and uninterested in meeting men, it perpetuates the very issue of not meeting enough quality guys that they are trying to fix.
No woman should wait till Thursday – Sat night outings to meet guys, unless she is interested in talking to guys who are so drunk that they won’t even remember talking to her the next day. If you are reasonably attractive or above, you should be able to meet guys on a bus on your way to work, or at a cafe during lunch, or at the grocery store, or anywhere else during your typical day. Eye contact and a smile are still the most effective ice-breakers with men, and there is no technology or dating app that can change that or replace the experience of meeting someone after making an eye contact with them.
Today, when so many people and especially women are glued to their cellphones almost 24/7, this is your opportunity to impress upon any guy who catches your eye that you are different from most other girls around. You are more confident, you are more friendly and you are more open to being approached and to meeting men. This kind of openness doesn’t make you look desperate or easy. This kind of behavior makes you more real than everyone else. If you practice this kind of more open behavior with your eye contact and a smile, you will be surprised by how soon the results will follow, and more guys will come up to you and talk to you, no matter where you are.
Many romantic movies put on our TV screens this exciting idea of meeting someone at the most unexpected time and place. If you have ever experienced this, you know that it is in fact exciting to meet someone when you expect it the least. This is one of those fantasies that should not be very hard to make a reality for most women. You just need to learn how to give the guys around you a green light to make a move and approach you.
And if you would like more practical tips on how to dramatically improving your dating life and your experience meeting and attracting men, check out our best selling “What You Wish You Knew About Men” guide.
A thing that took me quite litteraly decades to work out, to my own embarrassment, is that many women want a man more when he ignores them. Weird though it is, it's the "he,s a challenge concept."The thing however that is just completely crazy, rediculous, is that women think that men are the same and will want them more If they are dismissive and act uninterested to the man in question. Where on earth do they get this lunatic notion. Completely nuts!
And yet, these are the same women who complain that they can't get a good man. Deep sigh…
Other ways in which women can be considered to be their own worst enemies;
1 ) you meet a girl and she is crazy about you, but her friends leave, so she has to leave.
2 ) you then meet the same girl a few days later and you go over with a warm smile and say hello. The girl,s reaction is blank and she looks at you, as if to say, what do you want. Why has she changed around 180 degrees upon her opinion of you, well because it happens to be a Wednesday of course!!!
3 ) you meet a girl in a coffee shop or somewhere similar, and you get on great, but she does not want to go out with you, because “she does not really know you”. Eh?
4. ) you meet a girl out at night and get on great together for about an hour, and when you are at the bar or something, some a- hole without morals has used the opportunity to move in on the girl. Does the girl say sorry, but I am with another guy already, oh no. She is just as likely to disappear off with the a- hole for the night. Just how do you think this will be regarded by other men? Upon what basis is the girl,s actions any less heinous than that of the A-hole who has no respect for other men.
You said it! Even though I am no longer young, if I am at all interested in the opposite gender, I focus upon attractive young women. Even if I do get accused of being a perv upon the basis that I happen to have been around for longer. Perhaps it's to do with the cumulative number of chickens consumed over a life time. Reach the magic number, and hey presto a guy,s a pervert.
Another observation that I have had throughout my entire single life is that in many ways, women make it more difficult for men the older the woman gets. If a guy, of quite literally any age, goes to a student bar, he is likely to get nice, warm, friendly responses from girls of 17 and 18, and there may be some who show an interest on him. Now wind the clock forward to when the girl is say, 21 Only three years have passed, but the girl has become so used to being approached by guys that she enters a social environment with a look that says do not approach me, and is likely to give a dismissive reaction to a guy who tries to talk to her. Now wind he clock further on. The girl s now 28. Oh boy, don’t even try talking to her in some posh wine bar full of pretentious idiots. Now wind he clock forward further, she is now 35. Would she like to be asked out tithe cinema? No, she expects an expensive lifestyle, new car, international holidays etc. Believe me, it is easier for any man, even one of 60, to get an attractive girl of 18, than a woman approaching thirty. Perhaps women need to reflect upon themselves more, if they are getting older and find that they are not achieving much with he opposite gender.
Another thing to bear in mind is that it takes a huge amount of self confidence for a guy to chat up and ask out a girl in social circumstances that are not related or focused upon such things. For example, a formal office work type environment where there are 800 people and one pretty girl. In more conducive social environments, I am mr self confident. In the formal office environment it is just way too difficult usually. Do women make any allowance for this ? NO. Not one bit! They all have exactly the same perspective, if I have shown him interest and he has not responded to me because of self confidence issues, then I want nothing o do with him, and will get " done" by the married guy who will use me for once off fun. Oh aren’t all men pigs. Yea right, sure!
As a man I can testify that many men just giving up with women because they find them just too difficult. How many times when I was younger did I approach a girl on a dance floor and politely ask her for a dance to get blanked or a turned back. How many times have I started a conversation at a bar, when the girl then sais goodby and returns to her friends with drinks ( is it hundreds, or thousands of times?). How many times have I had obnoxious responses when I have tried to speak to girls when out at night. Now when I get returned eye contact from an attractive girl, or other signal, I typically don't do anything about it, because of all the years of banging my head against a brick wall. Many guys will find themselves will friends and colleagues who are not single and such guys have to go out on their own. Is this acceptable? oh no, he must be treated with disdain. The world is full of men who do not try because women make it so, so, so difficult for them. The other thing that is is infuriating, is how girls throw themselves at the biggest a- holes around. Self obsessed look in the mirror, follow stupid fashion trend, bitch like girls, type of excuses for men. “Oh, isn’t he gorgeous” you will hear, rather than “Oh boy, isn’t he pathetic”;. One of the biggest practical problems for me who are single is not being in social environments where single people are. Women should use this to their advantage. Talk to the guy sitting in the old mans pub, cos his mates have insisted they must go there. Ask a guy out, or proposition him, straight out, but try to make sure that he is the exact opposite of the types who usually get such offers. It frightens me when I wonder what is meant by the person who wrote this article, when she used the term " quality men" . Try taking the blinkers off and not targeting the biggest a- holes in the planet, and so many women might not end up saying things like “men, they’re all bastards” Look towards thy self for their own circumstances. I happen to be a older guy. I approach a girl and talk to her and I get nasty verbal abuse from her friend about being a perv. Next thing, a fat guy of about twenty approaches the same girl, gropes her, and sticks his face into her. But, hey, he,s no perv. The girl,s friends are fine with this dude.
@ Ronnie. Great point. Recently, one of my good old friends said that being interested makes us more attractive. This definitely goes against the whole notion of being a challenge but it is so true. How many times we, guys, experience liking the girl more just because she seems to be interested in us and just because she appears to pursue us a little more than a typical girl would. It's quite flattering, especially if she is attractive and interesting herself, of course.