There are a few rules you must follow when you meet a woman / go out with her in order to avoid being friendzoned by her. The broader logic behind these rules is simple – if you do not want to be her “friend”, do not do the things that friends do with each other.
1. Avoid Talking About Your Dating Life
There is a temptation to talk about your dating life and your online dating experience with the person you just met to break the ice and talk about something personal. However, you must avoid do this, because that’s not what potential romantic partners do. Discussing your respective dating experiences will kill any chances of chemistry quickly and irreversibly. Leave this topic to her girlfriends. It’s not your place to discuss your dating issues or her dating issues with her – at least not during your first few dates.
2. Avoid Having Conversations That Are Too FormalĀ
While being too aggressive and sexually suggestive can be a turn off and push a woman away, being too stiff and formal is just as bad. Nothing kills chemistry faster and nothing gets you friendzone quicker than protracted conversations about work or some other dry topic. If you have to mention work, do it briefly and move on to talking about something else.
3. Do Not Get Stuck On The Same Topic For Too Long
Make sure you don’t get stuck on talking about any one topic, however interesting that topic might be to you. If you talk about skiing for an hour or two or a bout restaurants or about traveling, you will be boxed into the skier guy or foodie guy or traveler guy category instead of a potential romantic partner category. Even if she is really interested in the topic you are discussing in great detail, this is still not going to change the fact that it will confine her perception of you to that thing, and that’s something you want to avoid.
4. Humor Is EssentialĀ
Humor, wit and sarcasm must be part of your conversation. An interaction without humor is by definition not a date but a friendly / business meeting. You don’t need to worry about constantly entertaining her, but using humor tasteful at the right time and in the right context will help create the right dynamic that you date should have. Of course if she doesn’t get your jokes or if you simply can’t relate to each other’s humor, this raises a bigger question – will you get along? Do you really understand each other? And, should you even continue seeing each other?
5. Don’t Become Her Social Media Buddy
There is no reason for you to become one of her thousand Facebook friends, or Instagram / Twitter followers – at least not until after you got to know each other better. Becoming one of her online groopies lowers your status, especially if you are older and should not be spending too much time on social media anyway. And if you really want to add her on Facebook, do yourself a favor and don’t comment on her pictures, because again – that’s what friends do. Lingering in her social media life necessarily makes you less attractive, and takes all the mystery out of your interaction.
