Five Questions You Should Never Ask Her on a Date

first date Many men literally kill attraction between them and the women who they go out with by asking them such questions that communicate all the unappealing and unattractive qualities of those men. To be successful at dating and talking to women, you must absolutely avoid asking those questions that literally kill attraction and any potential for romantic chemistry:

1. “Do you like me?/Am I Your Type?” – this kind of question literally telegraphs a desperate desire for validation and to be liked – a major turn-off to the fast majority of women. When you are out on a date with a woman, you should be able to tell whether she is enjoying your company or not within a relatively short period of time, unless she is extremely shy, so there is no need to ask the “date status” question. But even if you are in doubt, asking this directly should be your last resort and it should be reserved for those situations when you truly get mixed signals.

2. “What kind of guys are you usually dating?” – this is another unattractive question in which you imply that the woman has all the power in deciding whether to “generously bestow” upon you the kind gesture of spending time with you. Even if you don’t intend to, this makes it sound like you are planning to adjust yourself to what she likes so that you can have a chance with her. This will definitely get your interaction off to a wrong start.

3. “What are you looking for in a partner?” – this kind of question will turn any great date into a therapy session and “girl chat” taking your conversation into a heart-to-heart talk that usually girls have over a cup of coffee and which is not conducive to flirting and creating romantic tension at all.

4. “Her: What would you like to do? You: I don’t know. What would you like to do?” – this kind of passive attitude communicates to a woman a man’s total lack of leadership, confidence, direction and desire to court her. This is a major turn-off! Whenever a woman asks you before you go out “What are we going to be doing today?” your answer should be anything BUT “I don’t know. What would you like to do?” Instead, you could say: “It’s a surprised. You will find out soon.” and wink, or say playfully “Does it matter? You will be with me, so you will have a good time.”

5. “What would you like to do next time?” – making plans for your second date during the first date takes away that little power that you have as a man to make a woman wonder and expect your call and seeing you in the future. Instead, by asking this, you make her take you for granted right then and there.

Remember – having great first dates is just as much about what you don’t as about what you do, so by avoiding mistakes that are so easy to not make, you are much more likely to have much better first dates.


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Practical, effective dating tips and relationship advice.
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10 years ago

Yes, showing confidence is key. Also, do not talk about ex’s please!ex

10 years ago

Very useful and comprehensive article as always! However I noticed a minor spelling mistake in point 4, it should read "It's a surprise.." without the d 🙂