Sarcasm, Flirting and Attraction

sarcasm, flirting, and attractionThe importance of sarcasm to flirting and attraction cannot be overstated. Although not everyone is a fan of dark, dry humor, sarcasm is undoubtedly one of the highest modes of communication and connection between people. This is because by being sarcastic while talking to another person, you suggest that they “get” you – that they know what you mean and they can see the underlying message that you are trying to convey which might be the direct opposite from what you are actually saying, which is a great connection to have with anyone – your friend, your brother or sister, or your potential or existing romantic partner. Sarcasm is also the core of that attractive sense of humor that so many women want to see so badly in the guy they are dating. It is also the same element of personality that many guys find irresistible in women.

Sarcasm is a cornerstone of flirting. After you read the article on how to flirt with women, make sure that you understand that sarcasm is an essential part of creating attraction and sexual tension with those women who are considered “quality women” – the ones who are educated, well-read, and the ones that dig those guys whose personality stands out from the average, boring guys that they can meet anywhere any time. You simply cannot be attractive to a woman by being boring, stiff, and excessively formal if you will, unless she is equally boring and uptight.

For instance, too many guys treat a date as an interview, asking direct, boring questions that you would expect to see in a questionnaire at the DMV office. A sarcastic comment can be one of the best ice-breakers to start a conversation with a woman and it can also build and amplify attraction on a first date or later. Imagine that you are standing in an unusually long line at a grocery store, and you want to talk to a girl who is standing behind you, and your turn to pay is about to come up. What do you think is better to say to her to break the ice: the cheesy, cliche “I like your shoes” or if you say completely seriously “Too bad this line was so short.. I wish I could stand longer – it’s kinna fun.” The latter is likely to get a major giggle from a girl who can relate and who is equally frustrated with the same line and open a conversation.

Sarcasm is an integral part of flirting. When you go out on a date, and a girl asks you “Do you bring all the girls on your first dates here?” the “No, you are the first and only one I brought here” is hardly going to spark an attraction between the two of you. On the other hand, responding with “No, only every other girl” will show your confidence, wit, and sense of humor, and this will inevitably turn into flirting, unless of course, the girl doesn’t have sufficient confidence or self-esteem to handle it. Or, if for instance she asks you when was the last time you had sex, if instead of giving her the boring “two months ago” response, you playfully look at your watch and say that you are not sure exactly how many hours it has been, it would be a far more interesting response.

Of course, you should make sure that you are not sarcastic all the times, as constant sarcasm will make you come across as a social clown who is unable to remove the mask of sarcasm and be serious, or someone who is afraid to show his real self, or might even make a woman believe that you don’t have a serious side to yourself at all (which is never a good idea).

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About practicalh

Practical, effective dating tips and relationship advice.
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7 Comments

  1. @ Betty – interesting observations. Of course, sarcasm how to come out in a way that’s subtle natural and congruent with who the person is. The worst kind of sarcasm is the one you can tell is artificial, where a person tries way too hard to be funny in a way that they clearly don’t feel comfortable being.

  2. interesting article.. I like guys with sense of humor who can tease and be sarcastic as I myself can respond same way back if I know him quite well and feeling attracted to him then it’s ok because I feel comfortable with him and it’s fun when you both enjoy flirting with eachother. But if it’s a guy I have met (which has happened) seen him often and had some general conversations like hi, how are you doing- simply an everyday chit chat and so he makes a joke that sounds a bit sarcastic then it can be difficult to interpret that. I have sensed that he is attracted on me from his body language, his eye contact, smiling, postures and gestures he makes and its mutual because I like him too but its kind of tricky to figure it out whether if it was an innocent way of sarcasm or that he was making fool of me when I dont know him so well. So all I want is to get to know him better because I am curious about him. And I hope he was just flirting with me:)

  3. 😉 I will fix it for you.

  4. @ Shelby – indeed! Many guys know how important sense of humor is to women so they go with being funny overboard which results in making them look like clowns and takes all the mystery out of the situation. What percentage ratio do you, as a woman, suggest that guys should use of being serious/smart v funny on a (first) date?

  5. …SO ..WHERE is the "edit comment" on here..???? I misspelled a word or two, and I DO know how to spell. I am not accustomed to a laptop…:) SO , it SHOULD read : ' Spot on in MANY ways', and the word is REFERENCE. 🙂

  6. ….This article is spot on in many ways….especially in reference to the guy who cannot stop- EVER -with the sarcasm / trying to be witty and funny ALL the time. It does get tiring..; and I believe there is a BALANCE to be had, and it sends red flags up ( for me ) if a man has a problem with having a serious conversation or doesn't "get" that everything is NOT always ' funny '….as I am almost sure that a man would soon get tired of those same traits in a woman.

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