There are common obstacles that many guys encounter when thinking about making a move on the girl they have set their eye on, whether it’s in class, at a local church or anywhere else. Being aware of these obstacles is critical to being able to overcoming them, and then being able to approach and start talking to that girl you like or at least you think you like.
1. Over-analyzing how to make that move.
This is one of the most typical mistakes that paralyzes your ability to take action. Trying to figure out whether she would be interested in you and spending weeks or months trying to come up with the most creative way to start talking to her is nothing but a waste of time. Say anything overly creative to a girl who doesn’t you very well or doesn’t know you at all, and you are guaranteed that she will think of you as some kind of weirdo who can’t talk like “normal” people. Save you extraordinarily sharp wit for later and use it after you got to know each other a little better; don’t hit her with your incredible personality too early, when she knows nothing about you.
2. Waiting for too long to make a move and rationalizing your wait.
You should know from your experience that waiting longer is not going to make it easier for you to approach her. In fact, it’s going to make it all the harder and all the more awkward in your mind. You have been there before. You already know that whether you are lingering around a girl at a bar/coffee shop for too long or whether you have been waiting for months to ask someone out at work/school, waiting just doesn’t help, so stop waiting and take action sooner than later.
3. Imagining giving her an incredibly sweet compliment.
You might be dreaming about coming up to her and telling her out of the blue about how beautiful and amazing she is, thinking that her heart is just going to melt in front of you, and she is going to run over to you and jump into your arms. In reality, however, if she doesn’t know you (very well), that kind of compliment is likely to scare her or freak her out, or at the very least make her go “eww…, who is that desperate guy?” Save your compliments about how beautiful she is. If she is in fact that attractive, then she hears this all the time. If she isn’t, and she knows it, then she is not going to believe you. You are much better off saying something as simple as commenting on her apparent mood – “Wow, you look happy. What’s the secret” is so much better to start a conversation with than any kind of “You are beautiful.”
