So, you laid your eye on this girl who you think is really nice, cool and attractive, but oh, bummer – she has a boyfriend. It’s frustrating and you think “why even bother and try to get together with her” but deep inside you hope that one day you will have the opportunity to get to know her and get closer to her. And guess what, one day she breaks up with her boyfriend. You are excited! You feel that there is an opportunity to finally make a move. But how do you do it?
First, it’s very important to know what you should not be doing. Here are two common mistakes you should avoid:
(1) Although you may think that it’s a good idea to come up to her and tell her how much you like her and that you have been waiting for this moment forever, this is hardly ever a good way to move forward. This will only make the girl feel “cornered” and uncomfortable, especially if she hasn’t gotten over her relationship yet. It will confuse her and will not add anything to her being attracted to you and interesting in dating you.
(2) You should also not be her “therapist.” It’s ok to listen to what happened between her and the guy, to sympathize with her break-up and try to console her, but you shouldn’t provide her with daily sessions of listening to all the sob stories, as this will definitely turn your interaction with into a one-way trip to the friends land. Why? Because as I point out in my article on avoiding friends zone with girls, this is what friends do – they listen to each others’ problems and spill their guts to each other.
The best thing you can do is saying nothing to the effect of being happy about her breaking up with the guy or you being interesting in her for a long time, but instead – spend time with her and show those qualities of yours that will make you attractive and desirable. And those are being confident, different and funny. And to get on the right track of becoming a truly confident man, you should read the article on becoming confident with women.
Just being out with her, being a funny, charismatic, and interesting company will give you the opportunity to flirt with her and get physically closer to her when the time is right. And to remind you what “flirting” means exactly, read about what flirting is.
No related posts.
I have made this mistake in high school and I have to say that I have learned from it.
hey I read a couple of your articles and they really helped me a lot.
But I’m right now in a complicated situation.
First of all, there is this girl which I really like and I hope to get closer with.
But the problem is she just started a relationship with another guy and now I don’t know how I should act.
Should I stay more in the background and be more passiv until she maybe sometime breaks up ?
Or should I still just keep going like I did, which means talking to her as a friend with maybe a little more in mind ? (but not directly showing it, just a couple leads)
I appreciate your advices, hope for one soon
thanks in advance !
Shelton
I need some advice.l I meet this girl in my class and I managed to get her number. When I called she never picked up than she texted, it said “sorry can’t talk at my boyfriend’s house can u text.” Is she really interested in me and should I be nuetral around her? Should I continue to text/call her?
This begs the question – why would you pursue a girl who has a boyfriend who she is apparently on good terms with?
i need some advice recently a girl with me at work broke up from a 4 years relationship. after 2 months from the break up i like her and i have a lot of feelings towards her, so i started to show her that i like her touching compliments and she got that, and i know that she used to like me even when she was with her bf but i didnt make any move.
so i got the time to tell her that i like her and she told me that she likes me too so when i tried to kiss her she didnt want at first to and told me:” i just got out of the relation with my bf and i dont know what i really feel about u, these feelings maybe only needs.” but then she kissed me and make out and she said i dont know what i m doing and she doesn’t want to hurt me.
my question is does she really wants me or she just wants her needs to be fulfilled.