Don’t Let Manosphere Hurt Your Dating Life

manosphereIn the unlikely event you haven’t yet heard, there is a whole world of blogs and dating advice out there condemning feminism and the underlying culture, called¬†the manosphere. ¬†The authors of that manosphere message write extensive and often very entertaining articles about dating, women and the¬†dynamics¬†between the sexes¬†that revolve around gender roles, feminism v femininity, and the downsides of the modern trend of masculinization of women in the western world. They encourage men to¬†be alfa,¬†and advocate through their writing¬†going back,¬†at least in some ways, to the traditional dynamics between men and women, where men would be more aggressive and rugged, and where women would softer, more nurturing, and otherwise more feminine.The manosphere writers consistently make fun of the betas and the “white knights”.

Some of the articles may appear as extreme and hateful toward women, while others make brilliant, penetrating and very valid¬†observations without¬†clouding their message with any kind of political correctness¬†about who we have become, and where we are headed as males and females in our dating and relationship interactions with each other. If nothing else, many of these blogs share one common quality –¬† they are very well written, and it’s clear that the bloggers are gifted writers who know how to capture a reader’s attention, maintain it,¬†and make their blogs literally addicting.

One serious possible downside that reading these blogs can have on a single guy’s mind who is looking to improve his dating life is that these blogs may have the opposite effect on their reader. Instead of helping men become better at their interactions with women, the manosphere blogs paint Western/American women as unworthy of liking and dating for all kinds of reasons. They make it sound like all the American women are awful, promiscuous feminists who are unworthy of any kind of serious attention. Like any other sweeping generalization, this one is false as well. Reading that kind of advice will put any guy, who tries to find answers to his dating and attraction questions, in a worse position than he was before, because it will antagonize him against women.¬† Like many other manosphere readers, he will start getting addicted to finding comfort in believing that most or all women around him are evil, uptight, high-maintenance and bi-polar, who are not to be trusted. While some surely are, there are plenty of great women out there¬†too who are both educated, ambitious and professional, while at the same time are passionate and feminine on every level. It takes work finding them as they are definitely not the majority, but it’s not like most guys are worth talking to from a woman’s perspective.

Finding solace in believing that all women around you are¬†bitches¬†is going to do nothing good¬†to your dating “bottom line” – it’s not going make you more attractive, and it’s not going to help you meet, attract, date and have sex with more and better women. So, when you read these highly charged articles in the manosphere, take their message and their inevitable generalizations about women, feminism, the women in the west v the foreign countries, being alpha/beta, picking up women, sex,¬†etc.,¬†with a grain of salt. Use your own judgment when reading these articles, as many of the writers’ experiences will not apply to you for all kinds of reasons¬† – from the fact that you live in a different area or culture or society, to the¬†differences between¬†your own personal style, appearance, preferences in women, and what the writers’ idea of a perfect woman is.

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11 Comments

  1. There are quite a few downsides to marriage and more and more people realize this. This includes women as well. We can witness a major paradigm shift among both sexes, especially in larger cities – where people either divorce more or remain single longer or decide to never marry. Some say that the reason for this is because we are much more selfish than our parents and their parents, and that's why we are so reluctant to commit. I am not sure if that's the reason. Perhaps humans start getting divided into at least two major sub-categories – the ones who want to live in suburban area, seeking stability, large family with kids, etc… as early as possible, and the other kind – those who want to live in large cities and retain their independence for as long as they can or for the rest of their lives, engaging in more short term relationships when and with whom the wish.

  2. If I had discovered the manosphere earlier I could have saved my self an awful lot of trouble,some of the things I've witnessed women doing over the course of my life is absolutely appalling and leaves me with the question..who the hell would get married? Men are turning away from marriage quite simply because there is not a lot of women who you'd consider marriage material looking at their behaviour not to mention marriage laws being in their favour.

  3. “Not all women are men hating femitazies or high maintenance princesses.”

    Only 98 percent of them.

  4. @ I don’t have a problem with the manosphere. I find many of the issues they bring up to be extremely valid, and God knows I am not a fan of feminism or some manisfestations of it. I also find many of the manosphere articles and sites to be entertaining and the many writers are nothing short of brilliant. I was trying to remind guys not to take everything literally and at face value. Some of the articles insight hate toward all women. Stereotyping is dangerous. Not all women are men hating femitazies or high maintenance princesses. Some are and some aren’t. Besides, to truly understand why some women are the way we are and relate to what drives their behavior, we probably need to look at other societal changes, including our own behavior.
    I am pretty sure that some guys use or enjoy women bashing articles to justify their own dating failures and disappointments. It’s much easier to look for and find excuses as well as blame everything and everyone around, but yourself. The question is how productive and useful it is. That’s is something that avery guy will have to answer to himself.

  5. You forget one important fact here, which is the “manosphere” (and the MRM) have emerged as a direct result of the moral erosion caused by feminism.

    The man hate out there has been allowed to fester and multiply far too long. EVERY single television show depicts men as bumbling fools while women are always shown to be superior in every way – often this is portrayed with “humour” – always at the expense of men.

    Guess what.

    This is push back. Get fucking used to it. The gig is up.

  6. @ As sad as it is true.

  7. I don’t think that the so-called manosphere is the sole reason that the dating scene is so polarized, although I agree with some of the commentary.

    That said, the so-called “mainstream” media frequently portrays and demonizes men as nothing but perpetually irresponsible, not fully grown up, beer swilling frat boys. If that’s not enough, consider the following:

    1) There was a recent best-selling novel called “Are Men Necessary?”

    2) There was a recent New York Daily News headline titled “Why NYC Men Suck”

    3) There was a recent article in the Chronicle of Higher Education called “Who Needs Men?”

    These were all written by women. If a guy had written an article called “Why NYC Women Suck”, the man-hating feminazis would have strung him up and dragged him out of town by his scrotum!!!

    Sadly, the man-hating mentality was firmly in place long before the manosphere. Thus, many women firmly believe that men are the enemy, and bring zero to the table when it comes to dating. So, what’s a guy to do? If all that’s out there is the man-hating enemy camp, then I, for one, WON’T GO IN!!! I am not the only guy who feels this way.

    Therefore, gender relations (let along dating), have left us with only two camps: THEM AND US!!!

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