To most, if not all, men the answer to this question is way too obvious, but not so much to women. Dr. Phil, among others, has been sugarcoating the reasons why older men prefer to date much younger women for years in his shows about dating, relationships, infidelity, etc. Of course, he is not the only one who has been withholding the uncomfortable to hear truth. All kinds of false explanations have been advanced – psychological problems, childhood neglect or abuse, stress at work, etc… Every possible reason except the real reasons has been discussed in shows and popular magazines, when the true reasons are so obvious and so simple, even if they are at times hard to hear and accept:
1. Younger Women Are More Attractive Physically and Sexually
This reason is beyond trivial. Everything about a younger female body, skin and face is more attractive and sexually desirable to a guy. Although other factors, such as personality, character, etc., come into play and determine the overall attraction and chemistry, all things equal – a younger woman is far more desirable because her body and face are tighter and smoother. It’s not a good thing or a bad thing. It’s just nature. I just wish that we learned to become more comfortable with admitting and accepting this. If you are a woman reading this, it should not be hard for you to relate to this preference. Just ask yourself whether you would rather date a 35 year-old guy or a 65-70 year-old guy, and why. While younger women often want to date an older guy, assuming that older men are more confident, know what they want and are more established in more than one way, sexual attraction and elderly age simply do not go together.
2. Younger Women Make an Older Guy Feel Younger and More Alive
A younger girl leads a certain lifestyle and talks about things that her generation cares about. When an older guy finds himself in her presence, it makes him feel or at least it gives him an illusion that he is part of that younger world. A woman in her 20’s is more likely to convince an older guy she is dating to go out clubbing or doing something else active. She might even introduce him to her friends, who are of her age. When that older guy steps into that world, it makes him feel younger as well, and that’s a great feeling to have, however temporary it might be.
3. Being With A Younger Attractive Woman Is a Sign of Status and the Flashiest Trophy There Is
Showing off a young attractive woman is much more fun than showing off just about anything else, including Rolex, Ferrari, etc… Let’s face it – and older guy (or any guy) gets more looks from other guys (and from women) when he walks around with a hot girl, than when he drives by in a sports car or when he wears an Armani suit. Surely some people will judge him and will call him a nasty old man, but others will be admiring him and will even be jealous of the fact that he gets to be with and have sex with that hot young girl. Being with a much younger, attractive woman also suggests to the outside world that the guy is wealthy. While you might think that being perceived a sugar daddy is embarrassing and humiliating, that’s not how those who qualify as sugar daddies feel about it. They feel that the pay and they get value in return – the company of, and sex from, an attractive, younger woman.
Ironically, there are also compelling reasons as to why a younger guy would want to be with and date and older woman.
Also, younger women are healthy/strong enough to take care of an older man during their later years. It’s easy to see all of the reasons a man might want to pursue a younger woman… The having children response is definitely one of them…
that’s an interesting thought. I wonder how many men who are not as old actually think of this when going for younger wmoen.
Good for you! Women have a real reason for dating younger men. Primarily men from the Baby Boomers era are narrow minded like the douche here. I get approached by much younger men all the time and age is not an issue for them. It is only and issue for Old guys who need Viagra and are in denial about their own aging.
She wants the money honey.
fyi, I have asked many different women what women find most attractive in men. And they usually say it’s if he has a lot of money. Then I ask them. Okay. Now imagine that you date a rich guy and during every conversation he talks about his money and cars and houses and vacations because he wants to impress you. Even when you ask him other questions or try to change the conversation he always comes back to bragging about his money. How long will you continue to date him? They ALL say, yuck. He’s very insecure.
The truth is that women fall for men are confident, funny, and have interesting things to talk about. Especially if he can calm and cool when under pressure. Girls love that aspect so much they they get bored with most of the guys their own age and want more mature men.
So almost all girls want to date a guy at least a few years older than her. Online, girls 22 usually post that they want a guy from 25 to 35. Often up to 5 years older is considered not only normal but wise by their family and friends. Most family and friends will strongly frown on a girl dating a guy that is 5 years younger.
So all of society including immaturity of younger men pushes young women towards “older” men even if that is only 4 or 5 years older. So it’s natural that a guy that 8 or 10 years older won’t bother her too much if they really hit it off. And then girls sometimes get really curious after they find that they like a guy 10 years old even more than 5 years old if maybe a guy 15 or 20 years older might be even better.
But how many women in their 20s or 30s want to date younger men? Almost none.
And man almost never want to date older women, sometimes a few years older but rarely 5 or 10 year older. And if they do most family and friends will really frown on it.
So society general expects men to date younger women — at least a few years younger.
So it’s only natural that some men will fall for a girl that is 5 years or 10 years younger. Few people will bother them for that.
So there will always be some women or men will choose to stretch that natural lure of age difference even farther to 20 or 30 years difference.
So evidently you have taken an extensive survey and interviewed hundreds of thousands of men of all nationalities to come up with your narrow minded assessment? Once again, you posted that;
“Younger Women Make an Older Guy Feel Younger and More Alive “.
So in Your own words you state that Men who date younger women want to Feel younger than their actual age. They are in denial of Their own aging. Also, Not all men prefer 1 shape. Some like tall some like short, some like curvy, some like slender, some like brunettes, some blondes, some like A cups some like DD, there is an array. So I think you must be referring to Your own preference. You must be in denial yourself. So sad that you are so narrow minded and work so hard to justify your weakness, which is to be in denial of who you are and what stage of life You are in.
Oh, and by the way a women’s sexual parts function pretty much the same at Any age, while a Man loses the ability to function as he once did. Are you another old guy that needs Viagra in order to perform? What in the world would make an old, out of shape, needs Viagra to perform, with sagging sacs as well as other parts, think a young beautiful women would be physically attracted to that?! It’s only the money honey.
Ms Peterson, trying to personally attack me doesn’t get me mad, but it is somewhat disappointing. There are so many other sites out there where people insult each other one and over. I am trying to keep this site clean and useful to the readers so it doesn’t be one one of them. I must therefore put an end to this discussion.
Why not adopt.
I’m single now and 47. The other day I saw this really lovely woman, very fit and young looking but upon closer observation she had grey hair and some very fine sines of maturity that put her a bit older than me. She was a hottie. I was delighted because it felt good to see a woman who clearly exercises and eats healthy and stays attractive.
Younger women say I’m hot and it’s because I swim 700 meters several times per week. I work out and have a really rocking body, and for some reason I lost very little hair and only a few grays. So young women are shocked that I have a daughter who’s 23. They think I’m early 30’s.
Point is that sometimes older women look GREAT. But so do some older men look awesome.
The most idea situation for a late 20’s or mid 30’s girl is a mature man with a sexy hot youngish body.
I would LOVE to find a mature woman may early 40’s that looks very sexy and hot like that one I saw in the store. But sadly many women don’t exercise and eat right. And so they don’t look so healthy or sexy.
I feel for them. I have been through bad health and poor exercise before and it feels very yucky. In recent years, I feel happy, energetic and so ALIVE due to healthy eating and exercise.
Oh and by the way, younger men are more virile, their sacs don’t sag,( which there is no remedy for that any man is willing to with go) and more attractive. Men by nature are more controlling and selfish and If they are narcissistic then it is necessary to pursue a younger less astute partner who won’t see him for who he really is, or doesn’t care because she just wants the money. It happens all the time, would you concur?
Of course younger men are more virile and attractive, just like women. Those are the cruel ways of mother nature. I don’t know if men by nature are more or less controlling and selfish than women. Men are probably known for a different type of controlling and selfish behavior than women. If someone said that being controlling and aggressive is a more masculine quality, I would have to agree. I really don’t think that the men who pursue much younger women put that much thought into why they are doing it. Either, it’s a matter of sexual preference or having a status / trophy wife or a combination of both. It’s not so much about being seen or not being seen for who you are.
So evidently you are so old that you have lived in past generations? To sum it all up as biology is a cop out. To say that because 1 woman has less years means she is more attractive is ludicrous.
If you go into the past the Women who were catering to men were Intelligent and Educated something that most women were not allowed or encouraged to do, so Men sought out Mental stimulation to acccompany the Sexual stimulation which was neccessary due to the controls in place By men. These Women weren’t always younger, they had more interesting conversation to offer. Insights and wisdom.
Again, if women who are more mature are so unattractive, why are they sought out by younger men more often than men their own age? Because men their own age are in denial. Don’t want to face the reality that they are aging and less virile than they used to be.
The only honest about those relationships is that the women is in it for money and status and the man wants to appear, feel younger than he is. Being on the arm of a very young woman just makes a mature man look older and foolish.
Once again I post that the case usually has to do with immaturity of the male, Narcissistic personalities never grow or mature and they are in denial of their own aging process. A mature Woman is not going to be fooled by a fool.
I agree that many older guys who date much younger women do it for all kinds of immature reasons.
On the the note – biology is not a cop out. It’s the most powerful force. Men like younger, slimmer women who have larger hips as much as women like guys who are taller, with full head of hair and who have broader shoulders. There is nothing new here. It doesn’t mean that we can’t fall in love with someone who doesn’t fit any of those criteria, but it surely helps physical attraction.
As far as young men v older women – this is a totally different story, which is discussed here: https://www.practicalhappiness.com/dating-advice-younger-man-older-woman/
I beg to disagree with your narrow minded writing. Men who gravitate to a younger woman do so because they don’t want to accept that They are in fact getting old. That their ball sac is saggy, that They are less virile and are in denial! The reason they are a trophy is because they have been told by the media that a young woman is a trophy. The media has sold these images to men and brainwashed our male society into 1 image of beauty. That is why an attractive woman who is mature is approached by Young men, they are desirable to young men because they are still beautiful, desirable and interesting.
Woman who are over a certain age aren’t less attractive, the men who are in their own age category don’t want to admit to themselves that they are aging. Seem to be of the misconception that they can extract the youth of the young woman by entering her. Another piece of the puzzle is that a mature Woman is not going to be fooled by a fool. She has wisdom and experience dealing with fools and recognizes a sheep in wolf’s clothing when she sees one. Men who are Narcissistic never mature so to find a person on the same level of maturity and to be able to be in a one side wins all relationship he needs to seek out a less mature and astute woman, or should I say girl.
Well, at least you are not angry, Ms. Peterson.
The reason you mention is one of several reasons why an older man would be with a younger woman. Yes, some are trophy wives or girlfriends. How wrong is it is hard to tell, considering how common it is and has been through generations. In some ways, those types of relationships are more honest than others. The are other reasons – many, if not most, men are more physically attracted to younger women. This has nothing to do with societal pressure or media. It’s pure biology. Younger women are more physically attractive. To deny this obvious fact would be like denying that the earth is round. Does this mean that there aren’t older women out there who are amazing in every way? Of course not. I am only talking about physical attractiveness. And what about those older men who simply end up falling in love with a woman because they like her, and she just happened to be younger.
Also, I wish to remind you that just like it is with men – age and maturity are not always directly proportional. Some younger men and women have more personality and life experience than their older peers, so age is just one factor in the equation.