Today, it seems like a very cool thing to tell others that you are extremely busy. How often do you hear: “I have been extremely busy, and therefore I couldn’t do x or I couldn’t call y, or I couldn’t call/see you.” or “It has been really crazy at work/school lately”. Because so many people say this all the time, telling someone that you have been busy almost sounds redundant. Sometimes, I am very tempted to respond to someone saying that they have been too busy with something like “Really? I thought you were sitting around and doing nothing all day, just staring in the window, like I have been doing for the past few months.”
Contrary to what some might think, telling others about how busy you are does not make you sound more attractive or more important. On the contrary, it makes you less attractive because it discourage the potential dating partners you meet from wanting to get to know you. They have all had their fair share of talking with people who are “too busy” and who are impossible to make plans with, and many of them want to avoid dealing with more people like that.
If you are a single guy living and actively dating in a big city, you know that setting up a date or even getting a call back from a woman you met can be a major project. It might make you wonder if those women you meet could use a secretary to make it easier to get a hold of them and meet up with them. If you are single girl in a big city, you probably met enough guys who seem to be extremely unavailable for one reason or another, and you wonder whether they are truly that busy, or whether they are playing games, or are just not that interested, or all of the above.
Being too busy is not flattering to you, whether you are a guy or a woman. It might have been attractive before, in the beginning of the digital age, but the idea of being a challenge, playing hard to get, etc… has play played out long time ago. Making yourself available for the things you want to do and people you want to see is a vital key to creating a romantic connection. Being available without having to plan a phone call or a dates for weeks is yet another opportunity for you to stand out from the rest of the people who seem to not be able to manage their life very well. When you make it easy to plan things with you, you immediately communicate that (a) you are in control of your life; and (2) dating is a priority to you because you are serious about finding a partner, and you are willing to put that part of our life ahead of working overtime, working out, volunteering, etc… however important and nobles those activities might be.
No guy can deny being impressed these days by a girl who returns his phone calls text messages promptly, and who shows up to meet him when and where she says she will. Similarly, no girl these days can take men’s availability and punctuality for granted.